Like someone it's natural, right? But why whenever I like someone, that person already likes someone else first. Or even have a close friend. What have I done, Oh my God? Or maybe I have not found the right person, or whatever.
After I broke up from boyfriend, his name is Titan, I did not immediately look for someone new to fill my heart is empty again. I want to live alone. Yeah, you know? I was so afraid of love. I was determined to not open the door of my heart for anyone. I wonder, why Titan is as easy as it can get a close friend. Girl. But, if I may be honest.... she is my enemy. Ah, is not it. Or... yah, just call her 'bacotan alay'. Ya! Titan directly approaching the girl. I dont know for what. For just provoking me or anything. I also dont know. Yet when we dated, Titan once said that he thought she was not pretty. Iuuhh... But why now he likes her? Titan is a playboy, I know it. But... Never mind, it's his decision. Now I'm not his girlfriend anymore, I'd rather forget about them. I think of them as dung that I stepped on a few seconds ago. I hate them!
Until the end.... Someone turned my world. His name is... call her "K". He is sweet, sweet black, the person is not high, but I like him. He was industrious, active, and... good and not overbearing. Unlike Tiitan! he was arrogant. And I dont like his nature.
I've known him (K) a long time. He also had long known me. And finally, now we are communicating via SMS. Although only briefly, and sometimes I left to go some where.... but I'm happy. I can tell you many things to him. I think he's really nice. But.. you know? Boys? Sometimes he's too dirty minded. Therefore, I like to call him "Mr. Dirty" His name is fits =)) (I think, what do you think?) However, sometimes I also think.. Does he like me? Does.... Does he feel the same? I dont know. I'm glad to know him, but I was too afraid to fall in love. Yes, fall in love for the second time. I dont want to hurt my heart again, and I dont want to hate someone else again.
Mr. Dirty has taught me many things and...I got some strange new words. Like .. uhm ... let's call it 'bribikan' and 'kukut'. Oath! Previously I did not know what all of the sentence, but after I asked Mr. Dirty... I know what it means! And another thing, he taught me to not hate my ex-boyfriend. According to him, it might be easier. But I think it's very difficult! And maybe I will not do. hahaha=))
Until now, I'm still confused. Did I really opened my heart for him or not. I'm confused. I'm afraid he's like anyone else, and I? Hm... I dont want to be discarded for the second time.
But anyway, I think Mr. Dirty as my best brother and my best friend. I wish I could be a good little girl to Mr. Dirty. Oh, dont say 'I wish' but I have to say 'I will'. Yeah, I promise to be good little girl and useful to you, Mr. Dirty.
You know, Mr. Dirty? If you dont reply to my message, I will feel very anxious and miss ya. I'll keep waiting for a message from you, although sometimes it is long. Wait. I dont like it. But for you, I will do it. So finally, I like you Mr. Dirty. But I'm afraid to fall in love again. And I'm afraid you've liked the other girl, and she was not me.
So, thank you for reading the contents of my heart now:)
*And I hope Mr. Dirty read this:3*
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